An Analysis of a live Lisa Williams Reading - Is she a genuine psychic medium or just a cold hearted conwoman?

DISCLAIMER:
The following article is the opinion of the author and may not correspond with the opinions of BadPsychics.com

This article is for Entertainment purposes only, and/or for scientific experimentation

I am still getting people doubt me when I state quite clearly that self proclaimed psychic/medium Lisa Williams does not communicate with the dead, they insist she is legit and that it would be impossible for me to debunk her.

So I did a quick search on Youtube and found the following video, I chose this one as it is unedited, and no produced by herself or her company as far as I can tell, and you would hope the producers who had her on as a guest wouldn't have allowed her to research anyone or listen in on conversations with stooges, we know she does both, but it is unlikely in this example, although you should never rule it out unless you are in full control of the situation.

Also the crowd wont necessarily be fans of hers, so less likely to try and help her along out of embarrassment.

Firstly you can watch the video, readings start just before the 4 minute mark, watch first and ask yourself if she seems genuine or if it seems like she is cold reading (in other words faking it)

I will interject my opinions in BOLD type, please leave your own comments and opinions in the comments section.


Transcript Key:
Lisa Williams
Victim
Me


I do have a father figure and a mother figure that's standing right in the centre by this lady and the gentleman in the striped shirt so its in this section here.

So I'm not sure, the lady... I'm almost kind of thinking its the woman at the front actually.

May I ask my love is there a mother figure in spirit for you please? I'm sorry I've just been told there is a grandmother as well for you.

And so the cold reading begins, the audience is not huge, but it is large enough that you can throw something vague out and get a reaction.
Fake psychics will always use the "mother/father figure" routine, in this case the old mother figure. Now ask yourself how many people could that really refer too.

A mother, an older sister, an aunty, a grandmother, great aunty, older friend, old work colleague, and so on.

She also throws out Grandmother too, which is more specific, but we all have 2 Grandmothers, and then there are the Grandmothers of your partner and older relatives that are like a Grandmother, either way Lisa has already cast a pretty large net.


Are you speaking to me?

Yeah!

(What's your name... Amanda)

Hi Amanda

Would I be right is saying that there's a mother figure or your grandmother was like your mother in many respects?

Yeah.

On your mothers side?

Yes.

Ok so after throwing out a rather large and vague amount of possibilities, Lisa gets a hit on a vague Mother figure/Grandmother, now look at the woman, she is probably late 30s, so any Grandmother would potentially be 80+ years old if alive, so a pretty good chance purely by odds that there would be a dead Grandmother.

And she keeps showing me like baking I don't know whether she used to bake a lot of pastries or something because she keeps putting like a crust on a pie actually!

Are you asking if I'm a baker?

No I don't think you are actually because she is saying no no no you don't cook so do you not like cooking?

Ah slightly, its not my favourite thing to do.

So this ladies "mother figure" has managed to break the laws of physics and all she wants to talk about is baking. It is this kind of pap that convinces people you know!

This is pure cold reading, with a bit of body language reading thrown in.

Lisa actually stated that the "Mother figure" was the one who liked to Bake, but when the lady didn't react to that and instead asked if she was asking if she was a baker, Lisa turned the reading in a different direction. She actually ASKS the woman if she does not like cooking, she does NOT tell her, notice that. The woman replies it is not her favourite thing to do, which is pretty common in women that age that run a house, cooking is often not the favourite thing to do, so again we going on odds here.

Ah its not your favourite thing is it, right because she's just showing me no! 

Next trick of the psychic is to repeat back to the victim what the victim has actually just told the medium, now after the reading the victim will remember that the medium told them that they didn't like cooking, when the reality is the victim is the one who gave up that specific piece of information, this is how cold reading works.

Now also, she is actually coming through telling me there is some form of celebration! You wasn't expecting this I'm sorry my love! Umm but she is acknowledging the celebration that's either happening in the family - and your mother would still be with us isn't she!

She is, yes.

Now this is the bit where you have to go back to the beginning of the reading, 
Lisa clearly states "May I ask my love is there a mother figure in spirit for you please? I'm sorry I've just been told there is a grandmother as well for you."

So Lisa has already said that she picked up a mother and father figure, the father figure got dropped, and she added a grandmother, now the mother figure is gone and we are left with just a grandmother.

Do you see what she did there, she started with 3 people in spirit, and through asking questions, and watching facial reactions, body language and so on, she has now dismissed two of the three, because she didn't get the reaction at the beginning she can now ASK if the mother would still be alive, knowing there is a good chance of being right.

Because she is acknowledging your mother here and like there's a celebration around your mum but can you tell your mum she is going to be ok, so there may have been some health concerns around your mum recently is that right?

Now this is confusing, she starts by talking about a celebration, but gets no reaction, so quickly switches to health concerns with the mother, now it is safe to assume this womans mother would be late 50s, 60s etc, so pretty much everyone at that age has health issues, whether it is a poor joints, bad back, or more serious issues.

Umm there have been some family health concerns.

Notice the victim says FAMILY health concerns, and ignores the fact that Lisa was indicating her mother was the one with health concerns.

There's been family health concerns because I'm being told everything is going to be ok and that you need to just share that with the family ok and that's the reason she is coming through 

Quickly Lisa switches to FAMILY health concerns and ignores her own statement about it being the mother with health concerns. You tell me a single family that doesn't have someone with health concerns, I've never met one.

and she is also talking about someone who needs to have their hair dyed, I'm not sure whose been talking about it?

Ah me!

Seriously? Don't all women in their late 30s dye their hair when the grey hairs start coming through? You couldn't get an easier hit if you tried.

Ah right well there you go, she is laughing and saying just get it done, get it done, get it done, because either its been bothering or you keep talking about it but she loves you very much, anyway, I've got another gentleman coming through but we'll will wait!

And that's it for the first reading.

Lets have a quick summary of what Lisa actually said.
She started off with a dead father figure and mother figure, she added a grandmother.
The father was dismissed, and the mother suddenly came back to life.
The mother was ill, but then not ill, but a random unnamed family member was ill, There was a celebration that didn't exist, and a woman needed her hair done.

That was the entirety of the reading.

Would anyone class that as proof of mediumship?


~ ~ ~

Onto the second reading, this starts just after minute 6 on the video. Now go watch it first, and ask yourself if it seemed legit to you, then scroll back down and read my opinion.

I was chatting with Bill and he has got to get his knee sorted so just remember that.

Firstly this is really really dodgy, she has clearly been speaking to Bill off camera, so we have no idea what she has said or he has said to her, she could have picked up anything, but we will give the benefit of the doubt anyway.

Umm yeah, I wanted to throw this out actually because I wasn't sure but I've got a feeling that someone can relate to a younger adult that's in the audience like a younger daughter or someone who lost their daughter or a son. Can anyone relate to what I'm talking about please and it happened very quickly as an accident; it may not have been your child but it may be someone you can relate to. Now this is the time don't be shy.

This is where the whole psychic game starts to take a dark turn.
There is little in life worse than losing a child, and for anyone to use that as part of an act, to make money, well that is just a bit sick in my book.

If we can ignore the vile nature of the way this reading is going, I will try and look at it.
Ok so we have an audience of roughly 20 people near to her, then another 20 or so behind the panel, so a decent size. Now people will have been aware that a medium was appearing on this show, so there is a good chance people may have come along purely to see her, and even if not its a large enough sample size that there is a good chance that throwing out such a death would hit.

Notice how Lisa Williams says "younger adult" first instead of child, this then gets turned into daughter or son. Seeing no reaction she then expands it to any one, even not related.

So now ask yourself, as you read this, if not yourself, do you know of anyone under the age of 20 who has died in a sudden way? I know of quite a few unfortunately.

Ok, alright don't worry, I just kept feeling as though there was someone who passed in an accident. Can either of you relate to it? Someone passed in an accident with very sudden passing and I've got the feeling that they crossed quite quickly it was a very sudden... no? Can you understand this, who would this be for you please?

Really forcing it down peoples throats here, she is struggling and hoping someone can think of someone this would fit.

My brother.

And this would be passing of a sudden accident you understand that

No he died when I was actually born.

Now this poor bloke was so desperate he took the reading even though it was nowhere close to what he had happened, this is the desperation that mediums thrive and survive on.

Erm don't want to make it fit, it just feels like someone passed in a sudden accident it was like a head injury a trauma to the head, can anyone relate to this, its like a friendship, can you understand this?

You don't want to make it fit? That is all you do Lisa!

No. only the bombings

Oh right ok and it happened very very quickly and this would be a friend of yours is that right?

My sisters daughter.


Ok, and it happened quickly this happened, can I come to you please.... because this happened really really quickly, may I come.....

My sister's daughter.

Ok so this happened really quickly and what I am actually being shown is that this was like this massive impact ok and it had a massive impact on the family do you understand this?

Yes

Watching this really makes me feel uncomfortable, the way Lisa Williams keeps saying impact and pumping her fist into her hand, just imagine how difficult that is to listen too if your child had been run over.

Anyway she repeats impact a few times and gets nothing, so cleverly changes it to impact on the family. This is pretty despicable stuff.


And I kept being shown there that something still needs investigating or there was still some form of investigation that's gone on because I don't feel as though you have not had the full facts Do you understand this?

Sort of.

This poor bloke is doing his best here to help Lisa, but she is failing pretty miserably.

Ok. Its as though, I feel as though there are other things that need to come out ok?

She is jumping up and down and she's telling me she looks a lot like her mum or she looked a lot like her mum do you understand this?

Yes.

Remember this reading started off as a young adult, and now is a young girl jumping up and down. And what young girl doesn't look like their mom, that is their first role model in life. The man has answered positively to that, so now Lisa can expand on the appearance thing further, and make it seem like she knew all along.

And she is showing that me that the photos resemble her, she is actually saying can you say hello to the family and there is a connection to a teddy bear that they still have of hers all right, and this is really important she is just showing me socks for some reason, whether she always used to have socks in... there was a particular thing about socks and she is dancing and she's giving me the fact that she is dancing around and she is also showing me that she comes through in rainbows and there's a feeling of music that so you may find that music is very prominent ok has your sister ever mentioned any of this?

Ah no.

This part of the reading is known as shotgunning, whereby you throw out a lot of information very quickly in the hope that some of it sticks, unfortunately Lisa fails on the lot! Which is actually surprising as you would think if your kid died you would probably keep their favourite teddy bear about. No idea why she went on about the socks, that was an attempt to sound specific in the hope it would hit, of course if it doesn't the psychic can use the old "take that home with you" or "ask about it" and by doing that they make it seem like they know more than the person being read! Another classic fake psychic technique.

Ok well speak to your sister about it.

Now would she have a brother as well please

Yes

They say that a good psychic will never ask questions, yet that is all Lisa Williams has done the whole reading, ask a question and then expand on the answer as if you already knew.

Because she acknowledging the brother that she comes through in the brother's dreams as well ok, this was a massive... oh right ...

Again what a terrible thing to say and plant in the minds of people watching, she is forcing her nonsense on people who are not even there, really disgusting in my opinion.

is there a separation in the family now, maybe mum and dad have parted ways?

Ah no mum and dad have both passed.

So Lisa Williams here is 100% wrong, she took a chance at divorced parents and got it wrong, I wonder if she will try and twist this round? I think we both know the answer to that!


Your mum and dad have both passed ?

Yes.

Ok she is showing me that there was a separation n the family with a mother and a father so that would then be them coming through. Right ok, thank you, your father has crossed correct?

Yes.

So now suddenly the dead parents who Lisa thought were alive are now coming through from the spirit world! And remember that old trick of repeating back to the victim what they have already told the medium, she does it again by stating that his father had passed! Yet he was the one who told her that! Yet after the reading it would be quite easy for him to forget he gave that information, and only remember Lisa telling him! Again this is how cold reading works.

Oh right, You are very similar to him you look a lot like him would you understand that?

Ah no, my mum.

She really is having a nightmare with this guy, a pretty easy guess to say a big hefty bloke will look like his dad, yet she is wrong again and he reveals he looks like his mom! I wonder will Lisa repeat this back to him?


Or do you you look like your mum?

My mum!

He just told you that Lisa! lol. That was pretty blatant even by Lisa Williams awful standards!

You look a lot like one of the members of the parents because she just keeps coming through with the face, the face, and its a mirror, she is actually showing me that you're a good guy, you are such a good boy, you were a good boy and she wants to acknowledge that in that case, that are a good boy, and that she has the daughter so if you can just let them know that they have them, they are all together ok? 

This really is poor, she now repeats back to him again that he looks like one of the parents! Yes he looks like the mother and HE told you that after you got it wrong Lisa!

The good guy stuff is just filler and is nonsense, she finishes that off by saying the dead child is with his parents, the parents she thought were alive until he told her that they were dead!

And again she wants to acknowledge the ring, she wants everyone to look after her ring and dad's got something as well, all right but I want you know they are all together ok?

Ok.

She tries a classic line here about a ring, who doesn't keep a ring of a dead parent, he just says ok, probably past caring now and wants to go home.


Something about the shoe size, they're laughing about the shoes , have you got to get new shoes?

I buy shoes on line!

Again you break the laws of physics you come back from the dead, you speak to a medium and all you can do is talk about shoes, and Lisa gets it wrong again!

There you go, they're laughing about the shoes all the time, all right its just something she's doing ok so just watch out for that.

I'm going to leave you with that.

And that is the end of the reading, the first reading clearly came across better on camera as her cold reading techniques worked better the second reading was just painful to watch.

It is pretty clear to me Lisa Williams is a fraud, she is using clear and detectable techniques, there was not a single thing she said that proved any kind of real psychic or mediumistic ability, in parts it was truly painful to watch, she used some classic lines and characters.

So tell me, do you think Lisa Williams is really talking to these dead people? Or is she just earning a living by taking advantage of vunerable, grieving and desperate people.

As ever I will leave it up to you, please leave your comments below.

You can follow me on Twitter @JonDonnis

TV REVIEW Most Haunted Episode 5/10 (Delapre Abbey) Celebrity Special!

To air on REALLY - Thursday 18th September, 10pm

Ok, the title is misleading, it is an apparent "Celebrity Edition" and most like the last Celebrity Edition featuring a Welsh rock band that no one had heard of, this time we get 5 Rugby players that no one has heard of (outside of Rugby of course)

This time we are at Delapre Abbey.

The most important thing I need to start off with is the return of the now legendary Mel Crump, the true star of Most Haunted, and the next person odds on to be fired from the show for being more popular than Yvette Fielding!

Now if you haven't already make sure you go like the Mel Crump fan page on Facebook, she wont be around for long so enjoy her while you can.

Sadly Mel Crump's equally gorgeous sister Kim Crump is no where to be seen. Such a shame.

Anyway back to the episode since I have to write about it, we start with pretend demonologist Fred Batt, the most interesting thing about him being his receeding hairline, although I am not one to talk on that subject.

Fred talks and my brain automatically just switches off, it's times like this i really miss Dickie Fingers (Richard Felix), one of the most entertaining and genuinely excitable people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting, much taller in real life too. But unfortunately as we well know if you more popular than Yvette you are soon given your marching orders!

Quick list of people fired for being more popular than Yvette.

Jason Karl

Cath Howe

Richard Felix

Phil Whyman

Dr. Matthew Smith

Lesley Smith

At last Fred has stopped talking so my brain automatically comes back on now, and Yvette is meeting these Rugby Players, I am guessing that the West Bromwich Albion reserve team weren't available!

The investigation begins, I just cant see these Rugby players not getting bored and having some fun. Any-who Yvette starts calling out to the ghosties (which don't exist), a few taps are heard, no sign of Stuart or Karl on camera yet, and more importantly no sign of Mel Crump!

Have you ever noticed how Yvette Fielding talks to the ghosts much like someone would talk to a child.

And a stone is thrown at Mel Crump! If I was her I would report Karl to the police as obviously he was the one who threw it! That is common assault as far as I am concerned!

Here is a picture of the lethal weapon used to try and maim the perfect Mel Crump! How dare they!

Worth noting how after the stone is thrown by Karl, Yvette lets the Rugby players analyse it and gets their reactions, one of the rugby players is clearly pissing himself laughing. 

It does occur to me that yet again I am spending 46 minutes of my life watching grown people wander about in the dark pretending to talk to ghosts. The question then becomes who is truly the idiot? Those partaking in the farce, or those watching? My excuse is I am writing a review for BadPsychics.com so ask yourself what is your excuse!? You could literally be doing anything else and that would be more worthwhile.

Yvette is now whistling at the ghosties and asking them to "touch one of us", good job Cath Howe is not on the show otherwise for sure her backside would have been groped by now, and remember no such thing as ghosts!

Yvette tells us that it is time for a Ouija board next, and that protection has been put in place (Stuart puts a condom on) and that prayers have been said. (To which God though? The Christian God? The Jewish God? The Muslim God?, all really a waste of time since none of them really exist)

So add the green filter to the lens to make it look like night vision and away we go playing a game that has nothing to do with the occult and is owned by Hasbro!

Remember that time when Yvette Fielding got caught blatantly pushing the glass during a Most Haunted Live show cause she forgot to take her glove off? If not you can watch the clip at the following link http://tviscool.com/play.php?vid=173 

Since then, she has never wore gloves while playing push the glass around the table! Funny that!

As expected the glass starts moving around the table instantly, remember folks this doesn't work when people are blindfolded proving 100% that this is faked.

Stuart and Karl are being very suspicious and have mainly stayed off camera for the first 20 minutes, I am sure they will re-appear later on to cause some trouble.

Funny moment where Yvette takes her finger off the glass and lets the rugby players continue to ask questions, the glass of course stops moving completely, she then rejoins and as if by magic the glass starts moving again!

Anyone who thinks that Yvette isn't as big of a faker as Karl and Stuart needs their head examined!

This Ouija board session is really dragging on now, they end up cutting it short claiming that some very personal and emotional information came through and out of respect they are not showing it. hmmmm, why do I doubt that? Anyway the Rugby players have obviously had enough and have now bugger off to the pub and left Yvette and her croneys to continue without them.

The lack of Mel Crump is also very apparent, I am guessing Yvette has personally had her time edited down to a minimum since becoming aware of her popularity. Why they employed someone so much more prettier than Yvette does seem crazy! Perhaps they thought that Most Haunted fans would dislike her because she is pretty, but the opposite has happened.

At long last Karl Beattie and Stuart are off to investigate on their own!

Worth a special note here is Karl's amazing Cardigan!

We now follow the Chuckle Brothers up the stairs into the attic, and within 5 seconds a bang is heard and something is thrown past Stuart! So very predictable, Grandpa Cardigan Karl really needs a new gimmick.

Lots of creaks, bangs, swearing ("Shower of Shit"), threatening of the ghosts, and so on. Seen it a hundred times before.

Please guys, if anyone believes that this stuff is real please leave a comment below in the comments section, I need a good laugh!

Here is the formula for the Karl and Stuart show.

1. Turn camera away

2. Throw stone

3. Turn camera back and film stone

It is so blatant what they do, how they keep straight faces is beyond me.

Let me make this clear if I have no already. Karl Beattie picks up stone, throws it, Stuart films the stone, they both claim it was thrown by ghosts! They have NEVER EVER NOT ONCE NOT EVER caught a stone thrown on video from beginning to end. Don't you think that is a bit suspicious?

I know I am getting annoyed when it is so obviously faked, but when I read on Twitter people acting all scared at watching and tweeting Yvette and Karl and saying how brave they are it makes my stomach turn at the utter stupidity of some people.

I don't blame Karl and Yvette for faking stuff, that is their job, they are making a spoof tv show, it is what they are supposed to do to try and make the show entertaining, but when people believe it is real, I really do despair at humanity, and evolution for creating humans so gullible.

Also worth noting that they haven't mentioned orbs in as long as I can recall. Probably the only good thing.

This was probably the worst show of the series so far, mainly due to a lack of Mel Crump, the ridiculous and unbelieving actions of Cardigan Karl and Stuart.

I would advise viewers to not bother watching this episode as nothing of note happens, it is not particularly entertaining, there is very little of the perfect Mel Crump, and the so called celebrities don't really do anything.

All we get is a stone repeatedly thrown by Karl throughout the episode and that is it.

We finish off with Dr. John Callow reading off a script, with his Bret Hart haircut and ridiculous scarf taking more attention than anything he says. I wonder how long before he tries to cash in and releases a book with Yvette, well before you do John ask Ciaran how many copies of his book with Yvette sold, and then maybe you will think again.

Truly awful episode and much like Karl and Yvette's sex life it had no redeeming features at all!

I'm going to watch some paint dry as after watching that anything would seem more entertaining.

Review By Jon Donnis

Follow me on Twitter @JonDonnis

--

Most Haunted Ep5 (Celebrity Special)

REALLY

Thursday 18th September, 10pm

Delapré Abbey, or more properly, the Abbey of St Mary de la Pré (The Abbey of St Mary in the Meadow), was an English monastery situated in the meadows of the River Nene to the south of Northampton. It was founded as a monastery of nuns about the year 1145 and belonged to the congregation of the great Abbey of Cluny in Burgundy, France.

Fan Reviews of Pretend Psychic Lisa Williams

I often get quoted the name Lisa Williams as a psychic/medium who people believe in, as is often the case with such psychics, they appear amazing on their highly edited TV shows, yet when seen first hand in "demonstrations" their hit rate plummets.

Now I have wrote about Lisa Williams before and exposed her methods, cold reading and so on, but this time I thought I would try something different, so I picked a show of hers, went to Ticketmaster and read the reviews, afterall you can rely on her own fans to be honest about their experiences, and at least that way I don't get moaned at for having "Skeptics bias" whatever that is supposed to mean. So here I present you with a nice collection of fan reviews for a Lisa Williams show.

Now remember these are people who paid a LOT of money to see her live in a largish theatre, these are her fans, not evil nasty skeptics but her own fans, believers, spiritualists, woo folk.

And after reading these comments, ask yourself, do you think Lisa Williams is a real medium, or just a grief vulture preying on the vulnerable, the gullible and the naive, raping the memories of their lost loved ones just to make money?. Of course and as ever I will leave it up to you to make your own minds up.

You can read the reviews at the following link that will take you to the TicketMaster Website

Lisa Williams

You can view all of our articles on Lisa Williams by Clicking Here

TV REVIEW Most Haunted Episode 4/10 (The Galleries Of Justice)

"There's Something Nasty Here, That's The Sickest Smell I've Ever Smelled in my Whole Life"

With that opening line from Yvette and I believe Kim Crump (Superstar Mel Crump's sister), we have a perfect definition of everything that is Most Haunted!

Before I carry on with my spoilers and review of Episode 4, can I just thank everyone for your kind comments regarding my reviews, and your understanding of the pain I go through to sit and do this for you.

Anyway on to the show, we start off with a history lesson as Yvette enters the court room and sits herself down on the Judges chair.

Yvette tells us of...
"Lots of moans, Groans, and whines of desperation"
and that's just the Most Haunted crew having to listen to Yvette blather on!

Yvette catches up with Fred and reveals that she is used to finding him lurking in dark corners, Mr Excitement then describes what happens, as a brush handle drops down from the ceiling area, of course at no point do they point the camera up, or around the area to see where it came from, and strangely the thing is quickly ignored and they carry on! I am guessing they were not happy with Stuart throwing stuff so early on.

Firstly let me announce that Mel Crump is NOT in this episode, I hope she hasn't done a runner already, although it is announced that her sister Kim is gonna take her place. I hope that isn't the same Kim Crump that is a spiritual healer? Hmmmmm. Although regardless of that much like her sister Mel, Kim is also a bit of a hotty!

Anyway the investigation starts, Yvette genuinely says the following
"Can you make a noise with your voice please"

Well before she said that I am sure the ghost was just going to fart or click their fingers, but now she said that they know.

Anyway we get a bit more of Kim, which is a huge relief since Mel Crump is not on the show, Hey UKTV if you reading this (and I know you are) how about you commission a show for REALLY called "Mel & Kim Investigate" damn I would watch that! It could just be them wandering about doing well whatever they want!

Anyway back to the nonsense, and they can hear some knocking, sounds a bit like Karl tapping his shoe to me, its all very predictable, at this point Kim has to cover her mouth cause she is laughing so hard at the silliness, Yvette tries to cover it up by claiming its cause she is nervous!

After hearing a bang "right next to her" Yvette puts her old acting training into good use as she screams and runs away.

Yvette declares that in all her time doing Most Haunted she has never had anything like that happen to her before, and be so close. She states that someone is following them, strangely not seen Stuart yet!

They head down into the cellars, and another bang, Yvette screams, and now we see Stuart for the first time, as usual nothing is caught on camera, we have a lot of people down there, and Stuart and Karl are often behind the cameras and off screen whenever anything happens! We know as a proven fact that Karl and Stuart have faked things before, so how can anyone ever trust them to be honest.

Here is a picture of Karl for no reason at all!

Karl describes how the bang must have come from someone behind him and Stuart but that there was no one there!! Quick call the Nobel committee and get the Prize ready for Karl!

Kim is getting a surprising amount of air time in this episode, way more than Mel got! Methinks that something suspicious is going on here!

Has Mel been replaced by her sister? Was Yvette really that jealous of Mel Crump's popularity? Only time will tell! Although neither Kim nor Mel have yet claimed to have had their bum felt like Cath Howe used to have done to her regularly! Of course there is no possible way that was Karl or Stuart and must have been the ghosts!

Kim reveals that she is an 8 out of 10 on a scale of scared-ness. That's pretty high!

Karl and Stuart go off to investigate the wash house, at this point, where as the girls (and Chris) go to investigate the cells.

Stuart reveals he is out of breath and knackered, not sure the point of that, but he feels the need to tell us that, must be the ghosts, of course as soon as they down there things are getting thrown, ALWAYS off camera, this time it is a candle! makes a change from pine cones and rolls of tape.

More things being thrown and bangs and so on, as Karl, Stuart and Fred "investigate" and remember that Brush from earlier, it magically gets thrown near them! All off camera.

Kim is doing a great job on the team, and looking great doing it, Cameraman Chris keeps making noises, but at least he admits he is doing it every time, I don't think he is in on the gimmicks to be fair.

In a Most Haunted first it appears that Fred throws a cheese grater at Karl! It is not clear, and might get edited out of the final airing, but looks to me like Fred had the grater hidden in his sleeve, and when he turns round he very carefully throws it, I might be wrong on this one, and I would rather see on a 50" HD TV, but looked very suspicious to me and happens so quick its hard to tell.

Next up a bottle is thrown, a gate is slammed shut, and another candle is thrown, it is pretty blatant Karl, Stuart and Fred are behind most of this, I can imagine a certain section of viewers watching this at home thinking it's all real.

If you like high jinx then this is the best episode of the series yet.

Quick update of Kim, and she is looking scared. I hope when Mel Crump watches this she doesn't get too jealous of all the attention her sister has had.

Karl says loudly to the ghosts
"Can't you do it so we can see you do it?"

And he actually says that with a straight face too!

Stuart then says
"We mean you no disrespect"

to which Karl follows up with
"Yeah, but go fuck yourselves"

It's that kind of lovely language that really attracts the kids to this show!

The battery on Yvette's camera has run out despite being fully charged! Of course cant possibly be a rubbish battery, and instead must be the spirits draining the energy!

The investigation continues and Fred's favourite toy the cheese grater gets thrown again!

It is at this point that Yvette drops the smelliest most disgusting fart in the history of the show, at first she claims she cant smell it but then admits it. With Yvette and Kim now dry heaving, and trying not to physically vomit, Kim reveals it smells like rotting flesh, poor Karl having to live with Yvette if she does farts like that, no wonder he employs Kim and Mel as eye candy on the show!

If you remember the old Most Farted videos from years ago, I am sure someone could have a lot of fun with this footage and add in some great sound effects!

Yvette is now holding her nose and claiming the smell is too strong, almost like she is over egging it now! Everyone knows its you Yvette! Poor Kim!

At this point in the episode Kim is genuinely quite distressed, the ghosts don't bother her but Yvette's stinking arse has almost killed her!

They then enter a lift and of course the smell follows them! We get a bit of lift nonsense, as Kim declares she wants to get out, and the lift is now apparently stuck between floors. Yvette seems to enjoy forcing Chris, Karl and Kim to stay in the lift and breathe in her disgusting farts. She really needs to see a doctor.

I wonder if Yvette blames the ghosts for when she farts at home, or in the supermarket? The whole farting thing goes on a bit long to be honest, I am guessing they ran out of use-able footage so had to revert to this nonsense. I'm serious they have this whole smelly fart rubbish go on for a good 8 minutes of the episode.

Kim does not look at all impressed, and I think she's realising what she has gotten herself into.

After they finally get out Yvette proudly states
"That was impressive stuff, who could've imagined that"

In a voice over Yvette then declares that the events in the lift are some of the best evidence she has ever encountered. Yep a dirty fart in a stuck lift is the best evidence Most Haunted has ever given of the paranormal!

We finish off with Mr Personality Dr John Callow reading off a teleprompter, I am sure he said something vaguely interesting but I fell asleep listening to him.

And that's the end of the episode and an hour of my life I will never get back.

So what did we learn from this episode of Most Haunted, we learnt that Mel Crump has an equally fit sister called Kim Crump, and that Yvette Fielding has rancid farts. Well done UKTV and Really for paying for this! Now if we could just cut out all the Yvette and Karl nonsense and just have Mel and Kim Crump we might just have a show on our hands!

By Jon Donnis



Most Haunted
UK Premiere – Series Continues
Thursday 11th September, 10pm
S1 E4/10 The Galleries of Justice - Nottingham

The legendary ghost hunters continue in Nottingham and a place where people could be jailed, sentenced and executed without even leaving the building, no wonder it is said to be one of the most haunted places in Great Britain. The team are tested as a supposedly mysterious poltergeist takes a dislike to Karl and Stuart, while Yvette is followed by a foul smelling spirit and experiences her most compelling evidence yet.