---
Some of our readers may have come across self-proclaimed psychic medium, Jayne Wallace. She runs a business called ‘Psychic Sisters’ in the Selfridges department store in London, where she has gathered quite a following – especially amongst the celebrity clientele. Indeed, the main selling point on her website are some glowing testimonials from the likes of Kim Kardashian, Kate Hudson, and…...erm…Matthew Wright.
I must mention here that celebrity endorsements of psychics should be taken with a very large pinch of salt. Famous people lead very public lives, particularly in the case of someone like Kim Kardashian, who is never off the front pages of tabloid newspapers and magazines. It’s therefore very easy for psychics to find out information about them before the readings.
But what happens when psychics give readings to celebrities whom they can’t see?
Well, back in May 2012, Jayne Wallace did just that when she appeared on an episode of the daytime show, ‘This Morning’. You can see what happened in the video below. However, you may be cringing through your fingers by the end of it. To describe it as a car crash would be the understatement of the year.
Watching it again, though, I was struck by a number of predictions that Jayne made in addition to her on-screen blunders. As it has now been seven years since her appearance, I thought it would be a good idea to check out how many of them came true.
Let’s just say the results were ‘interesting’. Please read the following transcript and my analysis to find out more!
Key
Reading in normal text
Names of people and descriptions of what happens on screen in blue
Commentary by me in red
and parts that I wish to draw attention to in bold
-------------
Holly Willoughby: Now, she’s read for celebrities such as ‘The Saturdays’ and Gwyneth Paltrow, making Essex girl, Jayne Wallace one of the UK’s most celebrated psychics.
Phillip Schofield: Well, today Jayne claims that she can reveal key personality traits about our three mystery celebrities just by holding objects that belong to them, including a watch, a flower, and a croissant. We’ll start with a couple of other objects, so if you grab a hold of that one there….and what do you say about the person?
Jayne: (picking up an object from the table) Can I just say something quickly? I haven’t read for Gwyneth Paltrow.
Holly: Oh, have you not?
Jayne: No.
Phillip: Well, you should.
Jayne: I don’t know where…yes, I should. If you’re there, Gwyneth, come visit! But yeah, I just wanted to say that.
Phillip: Yes. That came from your press!
Jayne: My press?
Phillip: Yes, absolutely. See, never read your own press.
Jayne: No.
Holly: Now, you know…you know that that’s my ring because we showed it to you this morning.
Jayne: Yes. Yes, exactly.
Holly: So…but you don’t necessarily know about me.
First red flag here! Holly is admitting that prior to filming, Jayne was shown her ring and told that she would be giving Holly a reading on camera. Theoretically, this would give Jayne plenty of time to plan what she was going to say – or even to do some research on Holly. Just a quick Google check or a glance at Holly’s Wikipedia page would have been enough to provide her with enough personal information to regurgitate it back in the reading. So, sorry, Holly – she’s not going into this reading completely blind, with no idea about you at all.
Jayne: I just feel emotionally, as I link in, the ring picks up a lot of your energy, a lot of what’s going around you in your present-day life. I’m seeing for you big changes on an imminent level. It almost feels…this feeling of “I’m going to start to look at my future. I’m going to start to build on my family.” And it’s also telling me about new babies. I know you’re a mum already, but it’s about…
Here we go! Jayne gives the game away here by saying she KNOWS that Holly already has children. So, either Holly mentioned this to Jayne previously or Jayne found this out by doing some research. Jayne has also decided to go for a fairly high-probability prediction. It’s not a huge stretch of the imagination to suppose that a married woman of around 30 might want to have another baby one day.
Holly: Oh, my goodness!
Phillip: Not having another one!
Jayne: …more children…
Holly: Four?!
Jayne: More children.
Holly: Oh…I thought you said four...panic!
Phillip: Does it say when?
(Jayne nods)
Holly: Does it? Tell me! Do tell. I don’t mind…
Jayne: To me, I feel…not that you’re broody, but there’s this feeling of “I don’t feel complete with the two babies that I’ve got”.
Again, this shows that Jayne was NOT completely unaware of Holly’s personal life prior to giving the reading. Either Holly told her that she already had two children or Jayne did some reading up on her beforehand.
Holly: Okay...
Jayne: …and it feels you’re becoming more motherly, trying to spend a lot more time with the children, with the family, and at the minute, it’s this feeling of “Oh, one more wouldn’t hurt”.
Holly: I definitely would like another one eventually. Eventually…
Phillip: Does it say when?
Jayne: I feel on an honest level, probably by March, you’ll be pregnant of next year. So, within a year.
Remember this date. Jayne is claiming that Holly will be pregnant in March 2013.
Phillip: Ohh! I don’t believe it!
Holly: (laughing) I won’t, I won’t.
Jayne: And you know what? It will be the best thing that will ever happen to you. She’ll be a shining little girl.
Holly: Another girl?
Jayne: Another girl. It’ll be amazing.
Holly: Wow. Well, there you go.
So how did things pan out? Did Holly have a baby girl in 2013? Well, I think things are best summed up by this tweet Holly posted in September 2014.
So, even Jayne’s high-probability prediction was incorrect – wrong year, wrong sex. Not a great start.
Phillip: Now, have a look at that. (Hands over another object) Obviously, if that’s Holly’s, then that’s mine because there’s nothing that spends more time probably with me - other than my family - than my phone.
Jayne: You are a different character. I feel there’s a really strong confidence about you. You’re very driven. You know exactly what you want. You know exactly where you’re going. But I also see this insecure side where nobody actually really knows you on an emotional level.
I highlight this because it’s a VERY common thing that psychics do. They mention two opposite characteristics (in this case “really strong confidence” and an “insecure side”) – and by doing so, cover all bases. Also take note of how often Jayne says “driven” or “emotionally/on an emotional level”. They crop up A LOT in her readings – indicating that she has a standard script that she sticks to.
Phillip: Doing a poker face.
Jayne: ….so, I kind of feel on the inside, there’s a lot going on. On the outside, it’s very structured, isn’t he? You know what he’s like. And I feel within career, there’s so much more to you. And I want to put you on a plane. And I want to say like, “The world is there. Go and see. And go and explore.” So, I feel there’s major opportunities coming from other countries and then you’ve got to decide; “Do I want this?”
Jayne has such a garbled way of speaking. How exactly can a person be “structured”? Look up the word in a dictionary. It means to be organised or arranged in a logical way. A piece of furniture or a plan can therefore be well structured. But it makes no sense to talk about a person being “structured”.
In terms of the actual reading, Jayne went for another future-related prediction – something that could not be corrected on the spot by Phillip. But, seven years later, how did she actually do?
Well, a quick look at Phillip’s profile on imdb indicates no evidence of major opportunities from other countries. He still works for ITV and presents ‘This Morning’ together with Holly, four days a week. There’s been nothing else of particular note since that reading, other than occasional guest appearances on shows like ‘Coronation Street’ and a one-off programme about Prince Philip – neither of which Jayne predicted.
I’m therefore calling this another fail.
Holly: (inaudible) …Nevada, are you?
Jayne: Yeah, you could!
Phillip: (laughing) I’ve got some puppies I’ve got to visit.
Jayne: …go work in the desert.
(laughter and cross talk)
Phillip: Let’s get on with our others, here. Let’s see what you’ve got to say about them. Right, here you go. First object.
Holly: This is a watch, obviously. Not giving away anything.
Phillip: So, what do you see? Now, the person…I actually…(looking at Holly)...you’ve accidentally spotted two of them.
Holly: I’ve spotted two.
Jayne: I haven’t seen any.
Phillip: I don’t know who’s behind there. So, this is our first mystery celebrity.
Jayne: I feel a real strong creativity with her. She’s passionate….
Phillip: You know it’s a her?
Jayne: Yup. It’s a feminine watch
Phillip: A lady’s watch. Right!
Jayne: Yes, of course.
Keep this in mind. Jayne says here that she thinks it’s a woman because it’s a feminine/lady’s watch.
(Long close-up of the watch)
Jayne: I feel a real strong passion. She’s driven, she’s artistic, she’s creative. I get words and writing. And she’s – not flamboyant – she’s very sophisticated, but I feel that there’s a very strong sort-of flamboyance about her. And an amazing friend. She’s very loyal and I feel with her very much what you see is what you get.
Note that’s the second time Jayne’s used the word ‘driven’ to describe someone in a reading. The rest of this is a load of vague, contradictory waffle. How exactly can someone be “not flamboyant”, but have a “very strong sort-of flamboyance” about themselves?
(Silhouette of a man appears in the background followed by a behind-the-screen shot of Lionel Blair)
Oops! Ha ha ha!
Phillip: What you see is what you get? Loyal?
Jayne: Warts and all. She’s as you see her. That’s how she is.
Phillip: So – career? What sort of career? Career could be anything
Jayne: Careerwise – I’m going to say writing, creative. So she’s somebody…either she’s got a book or…it feels….this feeling of writing..
(Lionel shakes his head behind the screen)
Nope. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Lionel, he was a dancer and choreographer in the 1960s, before becoming more well-known as a TV personality on shows like “Give us a Clue”. You can read more about him on his Wikipedia profile here.
Jayne: I don’t feel actress. I just feel “I wanna write” or…she’s very good with psychology.
Wrong again. Lionel obviously isn’t a woman, but he has occasionally acted in films and TV series. However, he’s not a writer and I can’t find any connection with psychology.
Holly: Ah, okay….
Jayne: She’s quite analytical in a way and a very, very deep thinker.
Phillip: Anything else that would pinpoint her? For her to say “Oh, yes. That’s a very personal thing.”?
Jayne: I think homelife is happy…erm…She’s…I would say grounded, safe, and secure. That’s how I see her. There’s certain areas that I can’t mention. There’s certain things that I can’t say. But I feel for me…it feels really, really great. She’s a good person.
A very vague statement. And one that is likely to be true for many people.
Holly: Okay.
Phillip: Let’s bring this person in. In you come. Who is that person?
Jayne: I’m no good with hidden cameras.
Holly: It’s a man!
(Screen draws back revealing Lionel)
Phillip: It’s a man!
Jayne: Oh, he is a woman! Oh, I don’t mean that rudely!
No, he isn’t! What are you on about?
(Jayne stands up to greet Lionel)
Phillip: It’s a man! In you come.
Jayne: (inaudible)…gentle and sensitive.
Oh, I can see where this is going. See below.
Holly: Welcome, welcome, welcome. Come and take a seat!
Phillip: Have a seat, Lionel. How lovely to see you!
Phillip: So major gender issue there.
Holly: So, obviously you are not a female.
Lionel: (to Holly) No. Not at all.
Phillip: So – writing?
Lionel: No.
Phillip: Don’t write.
Jayne: Totally wrong.
Phillip: No, no. Wrong there. What were the other things that you mentioned?
Lionel: I don’t know. (Looking at Jayne) What did you mention?
Holly: Family life?
Jayne: Sensitive, gentle.
You did not mention either of those characteristics during the reading! You only said them after Lionel was revealed to be the mystery celebrity. And now you’re trying to make out that you thought he was a woman because he’s “gentle and sensitive”? Bit patronising. And actually, he doesn’t appear to be either of those things if you take a look at this clip from ‘Celebrity Big Brother’.
Lionel: Family? Well, I’ve been married 45 years. I’ve got three children…
Jayne: Aw!
Lionel:....three grandchildren. And when my mother died, she only left a little bit of money.
Jayne: (interrupting) So, he said it. I weren’t allowed to say it. That was what I was linking with!
I’m calling BS on this. Look back at the transcript. You clearly said that you thought the mystery celebrity was a woman because it was a feminine/lady’s watch.
Phillip: (Sounding unconvinced) Well….
Lionel: And anyway, the money that she – I wasn’t going to spend it. I bought that watch.
Jayne: That may be why it’s gentle and feminine.
Again, I’m calling BS on this for the reason stated above. It sounds like Jayne is desperately trying to redeem this disastrous reading.
Phillip: That’s a lovely story. But that was a major miss, I have to say.
Jayne: Yeah, major miss. I’m sorry.
Phillip: You couldn’t be further wrong there. Thank you, Lionel. It’s lovely to see you.
Lol! I don’t think Phillip is buying her attempts to claw this one back – and Jayne eventually gives up and admits this too.
Holly: Lovely to see you.
Phillip: Always a pleasure!
Lionel: And you too! Holly, lovely to see you.
Phillip: Thank you very much. Thank you.
(Jayne hands Lionel back his watch)
Phillip: You may have that as well, yes.
(Lionel gets up and walks off camera)
Holly: Let’s move on to our next item. Where are we going next? Which one?
Jayne: Flower
Phillip: We’re going onto the rose now.
Holly: Flower. So, this is a yellow rose.
Jayne: (picking up the rose) Okay, with flowers, you look at the colours, you work with the smell. It’s actually a very, very beautiful flower and it’s actually very, very well formed. And I would say this is significant to that person.
I’d say it’s more significant to the condition of the rose bush, even with my minimal knowledge of botany and horticulture.
(Camera shows a behind-the-screen shot of Sarah Greene)
Jayne: But I also feel there’s a few emotional issues going on because the petals are fallen a little bit.
Holly: Right
Jayne: And I feel that’s more about her past. I feel it’s more about where she’s been, where she’s going. So, I’m still going to say it’s a lady. I feel in the middle (fingering the centre of the rose), there’s a lot of surprises to come and, as the flower unfolds, it’s just looking at the individual petals, but I’m also seeing lots of loose things going on inside. And I think because of that, I feel she’s looking at really severe changes in her life, but in a good way.
Holly: In what area?
Jayne: I’m going to say more about career. I’m going to say more about within herself, it’s more about the career. It’s really about new ambitions.
A lot of vague waffle here about flowers and emotions. Then, there’s a bit at the end about major changes in her life – but good ones related to her career. Keep this in mind for later.
Phillip: Okay, let’s bring her out and you can reiterate all these things to the person. Who is our mystery celebrity?
Holly: Who is it?
(Screen draws back revealing Sarah).
Phillip: Ahh- ha ha! It’s Gorgeous Sarah!
Holly: Lovely to see you!
Sarah: (Stepping over to greet Phillip) Thank you, thank you. (to Holly) Sorry.
Phillip: Hello, Sweetheart! (Exchanging kisses with Sarah) How are you, Gorgeous?
Sarah: (to Holly) It’s a few wives back, you understand! (laughter)
Phillip: So, just reiterate those points there. Could you hear back there?
Sarah: I could just about hear, yes.
Phillip: Was any of that accurate?
Sarah: The reason the petals…when I picked it this morning, it was a few hours ago and they were absolutely perfect. I wanted to get the most perfect one as I’m very, very fond of this little…these two little rose trees that I’ve got outside my kitchen door. And, of course, it’s gone a bit...you know, it’s come in the car and it’s gone a bit funny.
Yup, you’ve said it. All flowers will wilt once they’ve been picked – especially if you don’t put them in water. Nothing to do with emotional issues in Sarah’s past.
Jayne: But also, she’s…you’re very spiritual, you know that.
Sarah: Am I?
Lol! The tone in Sarah’s voice seems to indicate the opposite.
Jayne: And you have a lot of…I feel a lot of feelings for people. You care and worry about what people think and people feel.
(Shot of Phillip with a very sceptical look on his face)
Jayne: And I still…I feel emotionally it’s more about...for you it’s about…I just almost want to pluck the petals out and give them to you.
What a weird thing to say!
Sarah: Do you?
Jayne: Don’t know why.
Sarah: Why is that?
Jayne: Because I think you’re a flowerer and that’s how people see you.
Holly: Ooh. There you go.
Phillip: There you go. There you go. Thank you very much indeed.
Sarah: Thank you. Now I move off? Yes? (to Jayne) Well, good luck with the next one. Thank you for that. Thank you. I shall clear.
(Sarah gets up and walks off set)
Sounds like Sarah wasn’t too impressed with Jayne. Frankly, it wasn’t much of a reading as the most that Jayne could come up with were vague references to positive career changes. Come to think of it, this was the same thing that Jayne told Phillip in his reading!
To be honest, Sarah’s career hasn’t been notable for decades. She used to appear regularly on TV until the early 1990s, presenting children’s shows like ‘Blue Peter’ or ‘Going Live!’ with Phillip. But after that, things went quiet – and she now only turns up occasionally on our screens. A look at her imdb profile indicates that this has pretty much remained the same for the last seven years.
There WAS one major change that did occur in Sarah’s life. However, it wasn’t a good one and it wasn’t related to her career. Sarah’s husband of 25 years died in 2015, following complications from heart surgery.
Strange how Jayne didn’t predict that.
Holly: (handing over final item to Jayne) And then we have a croissant. So, let’s have a look how you’re going to do this time.
Jayne: I don’t know how I’m going to hold this. I get a very strong male influence from this. I feel he’s strong, he’s very structured. Erm...I feel emotionally, there’s a lot of happiness around him. He’s very…I would say gifted in so many different areas.
Note how Jayne used that word “structured” once again. What is she on about? Also bear in mind what she says about “a lot of happiness around him”.
(Camera shows a behind-the-screen shot of former X-Factor contestant, Johnny Robinson)
Jayne: So, I’m going to say he’s a man who likes to do a lot of different things within his life and I see for himself…I don’t know…I just get really…in a way new channelling of energy as well. I still want to say ‘writing’, so I don’t know if I was wrong because maybe they’ve all muddled themselves up, but I still feel there’s a writer amongst them all.
Phillip: Let’s have a look. Is it a writer? Is it a strong man who knows his own mind? Let’s have a look. In you come.
In a word, no! No offence to the guy, but you won’t see him competing in the Mr. Universe contest.
Holly: Not strong enough to open the door.
(Screen draws back to reveal Johnny. Everyone bursts out laughing.)
Holly: Hello Johnny!
Jayne: (standing up to greet Johnny) How are you? He’s the girl! He’s the girl!
No, he isn’t! And he isn’t a writer either.
Johnny: I was going to bring a banana, but I didn’t want you to slip up on the reading, so I had a croissant.
Holly: So, writing? Writing? Any writing? You writing any music?
Johnny: I’m doing some lyrics, Holly.
Holly: There you go.
Johnny: I’ve been writing some lyrics.
Jayne: And sell them to other people.
Johnny: I could try! Andrew Lloyd Webber!
Jayne: Excellent!
Johnny: Or something like that. I don’t know.
This really is clutching at straws. I admit I had to look this guy up because I hadn’t heard of him before. Turns out he’s a part-time drag queen and was one of the ‘joke acts’ on the X-Factor back in 2011. Since then, he’s pretty much faded from the public eye. He’s certainly not had any hit records and Andrew Lloyd Webber doesn’t appear to have bought his lyrics.
I did manage to locate this video, which caught up on his life eight months ago. In it, he confirmed that nothing much has happened. The one interesting thing that he mentions is that he suffered a long period of depression at the time of the X-Factor (which was not long before the reading took place) because of the death of his father from lung cancer and two brain tumours.
Therefore, Jayne’s claim that “there’s a lot of happiness around him” would appear to be wrong.
That’s 5/5 fails
Holly: Very good.
Phillip: Well, there we go. This is the…this is the book. (holding up a book with Jayne’s face on the cover) It’s ‘My Psychic Stories’. True stories…true stories of spirit contact. There we go. That’s Jayne’s book. Thank you very much indeed.
Jayne: Thank you very much.
Phillip: (to camera) Love to know what you think about all of that.
If you want my honest point of view, Phillip, I think that Jayne Wallace has all the psychic ability of a dustbin. I’ve seen some truly abysmal psychic readings in my time – but hers just might be the biggest turkeys of them all.
My advice to anyone reading this is to save your cash. If this performance is anything to go by, the book isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on. And in my opinion, there would only be one bigger waste of money. (See below).
1 comment:
Quite right mate, it's not the number of reports or believers that matter, it's the quality of the individual cases, which is uniformly dismal.
Post a Comment